Couples

Couples counseling helps people communicate better, and thereby improve the quality of their relationship.

Why Men Don’t Want to go to Couples Counseling (and how to talk about it)

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First of all, it is important to understand that men are not “less emotional” than women; we are just inclined to keep those feelings to ourselves or express them differently. However, the feelings that we experience are influenced by our unique biochemistry and subtle brain structure differences. While men and women are far more alike than different, the differences can be confusing and unsettling, to say the least. One of these differences involves how we deal with conflict management and ...

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You Cannot Bake the Cake then Add the Sugar

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When you are in a relationship whether it is dating or marriage, you cannot simply plug in major corrections after the relationship has been established for some time . . . you must take the time to work through any hurt feelings, anger and resentment. Then as you move forward re-establishing trust, you are able to see if recovery is possible, and most often it is. But not if you simply try to behave better and expect immediate forgiveness and ...

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Emotional Rent – How much are you paying?

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Have you ever felt like you’re in a relationship where you have to pay emotional rent? It’s a relationship where you may get some of your needs met, but it comes at a cost of putting up with a variety of difficulties like passive-aggressive guilt trips, controlling behaviors, entitlement, manipulation, etc.

Can you really afford that kind of rent?

If you need help dealing with this, please get in touch.

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Romantic Anxiety: Fear of Relationships

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When it comes to dating and romantic intimacy, all anxieties are not exactly the same; they’re certainly related in a variety of ways, but the different forms of romantic anxiety each have distinct differences. Just to name a few of these fears:

  1. Fear of connection (related to Social Anxiety)
    1. Associated fears: commitment, affection/intimacy, loss of independence, of being loved/accepted, being overwhelmed
  2. Fear of performance
    1. Associated fears: having to work too hard, failure, sexual performance, making a mistake in who you pick
  3. Fear of being hurt ...
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Anticipatory Grief (pre-grief)

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Anticipatory grief, or pre-grief, happens when we know when in advance that we are going to lose something or someone that we care about. It may be due to a terminal illness of a loved one, an impending job loss, loss of a relationship or even knowing that we are going to move. In these cases, the grief still hurts and takes time to heal from, but the advance notice gives us a chance to wrap up loose ends, to ...

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Communication Skills

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  • Do you feel like people just cannot seem to get what you are saying?
  • Do people often tell you that YOU don’t get what they are saying?
  • 80% of our messages are non-verbal (eye contact, body language, facial expression).
  • Of the 20% that is verbal, we can learn to be mindful of which words work best for our message.

Communication skills are about how to listen and how to be heard, not just how to talk. Communication is a cooperative process; in other words, while ...

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Family Dynamics

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  • Dread going home at the end of the day? Do you find reasons to stay away?
  • Recognize that sinking feeling when you pull up and see that your spouse is home?
  • Are you more irritable with your loved ones than usual?
  • Feeling isolated in your family? Does your home feel like a prison?
  • Do you know what you want your family to feel like, but not sure how to get it there?

Family provides us with our first lessons in how to live and love. ...

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